Love Skill #47 – Gently Move Past the Story

Peace Skill #8   (Love Skill #47)

Gently Move Past “The Story”

By Dr. Scott Peck 


When those in conflict
move past their “story,” new openings
for peace emerge


Moving past the “story” can be a major hurdle in creating peace.

In conflict, there is always a “story.” Each side feels wronged. Each side feels justified. Each side knows the “facts.” Both sides have rehearsed and retold their versions of the “story” many times. Some stories seem hard, almost impossible, to let go.

This is exactly where you step even further into the peace process as a Love Master. You know these stories must be told. They need to be vented and emotionally released. The “story” needs to be heard and understood.

But once that happens, then what?

Then you gently guide those in conflict to move past their story. The key word here is “gently.” There’s no rush. Creating peace, remember, is a process more than an outcome. Focus on the process.

For eventual, true peace, of course, there will need to be forgiveness and solutions for unity and justice. But for now, in this new tender moment, after someone’s “story” has been heard, there is an opening, however slight, for moving past the story into deeper peace.

So, for example, you might say, “Thank you for sharing your experience. It’s valuable to hear and understand your point of view. I’m glad you’ve expressed it so fully and openly. I imagine you feel some relief just getting it out so clearly.” And then, after reflecting back so they know you heard them accurately, you might say to them, “Even though it may seem far off, what do you envision as the next step towards peace?”

This, of course, is a loaded question and may take you on another ride of the “story,” but the question is also speaking to the other person’s Highest Self and offering an invitation to higher ground.

Suppose the person says, “I have no idea what the next step is. There is no solution.” This is OK. The peace process is gently unfolding. There is at least a discussion now of what a “next step” might be. You have successfully and gently moved past the “story.”

You might say. “I know it seems impossible to imagine a solution, but I believe in my heart that there is one and I’m going to stick with you until we find it.” And the process of peace moves forward another emotional inch.

The words on this page are only samples. Let Love put the perfect words of peace in your heart. Those in conflict will feel your heart genuinely caring for their suffering. They will feel your commitment to seeking real peace.

You are not forcing peace on anyone, but creating an environment for peace to naturally emerge. This is the patient, sometimes invisible, work of a Love Master in the midst of creating peace.

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Copyright (c) 2006-2017 by Scott & Shannon Peck

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